The Top 3 Things Keeping You From Achieving Your Goals This Year.

Since we are half way through this year, I thought I would ask the question, “How are those New  Years Resolutions coming along?” Remember that list you created on January 1^st, the one you pinned on your corkboard  underneath all of the “important stuff.” Or perhaps its buried so deep in your iphone notes that you’d have to scroll for days to even find it.

Like many people, I created a list of things I wanted to achieve this year: I wanted to publish my book (in progress), I wanted take a trip to France (scheduled for October), and I wanted to work on my “stuff” (ongoing, but I'm doing it).

Ah, stuff! We all have it, we all know it’s there, but for some reason, it always gets swept under the rug because there’s always something else to do. Fortunately, I have found a really cool way to deal with my stuff, and I wanted to introduce it to you in this way, because I think it is actually part of why you may not be achieving your goals, whether they are for New Years, yourself, or any other reason.

So, let’s break this down here. Honestly, if you haven’t achieved your goals then it’s probably because:

1.       You Didn’t Set Any Goals. If you live with the expectation that everything great idea that pops into your head will just manifest into reality without a plan, then I would love to talk to you because you are a total phenomenon!

2.       You Didn’t Create an Action Plan. Perhaps when you made your list you had several things you wanted to accomplish, and you thought that somehow you’d figure it out. Unfortunately, we don’t always have all the answers, and sometimes we may want things to happen and have no idea how to do it. So what happens? Naturally, we give up. Instead of finding someone who has achieved what we want and modeling their behavior, or doing research on how to accomplish your goal, you throw in the towel and call it quits. This concept actually leads right into the third thing keeping you from achieving your goals…

3.       You Can’t Get Our of Your Own Head! In my upcoming book, 30 Reasons You Didn't Get Hired, I go into specific detail on how this one thing keeps people from getting their dream jobs. One of the things I’ve been learning on my own journey is that our brain will strive to answer any question we think.  If you ask, “why can’t I lose weight?” Your brain will probably say “because your lazy!” Why? Probably because you’ve been telling yourself over and over again that you’re lazy. If you change the question , though to, “What can I do today to bring me closer to my goal of having a healthy lifestyle?” Your brain will probably think of 100 things you could do: go to the gym, make great food choices, stop eating when you’re full… see what I mean.

 

I’m going to deep dive into this one a little more because we all have automatic thoughts that are popping into our head all the time, and controlling them can seem akin to wrangling a toddler hyped up on sugar smacks. BUT, there is a tool I found that has been exceptionally effective in helping me manage my thoughts, called The Model, created by The Life Coach School founder, Brooke Castillo. I am inserting a photo of it here,

 

 

which is barely legible, I know, and is also messy (I KNOW) because one of my issues is getting over perfection, which is why I am comfortable sharing it with you here, instead of wasting 10 hours creating a beautiful one for just this article. But, I keep this at my desk as a handy resource for when the thoughts start taking up my energy.

 

Brooke has a great youtube video where she teaches the model, so please watch it if you’d like in-depth analysis on it, but here is the basic idea:

When you have a thought, consider the following:

 

C- Circumstance: What is the circumstance you are reacting to?

T-Thought: What is the thought I'm thinking about the circumstance?

F-Feeling: How do I feel when I think this thought?

A-Action: What is the action (or non-action) I take when I feel_____?

R-Result: What is the outcome I created with this (non) action?
 
If you are struggling to achieve your goals because of the thoughts you are telling yourself, then I absolutely encourage you to go through The Model with your thoughts to create a new result for yourself. If you're just starting then begin by getting clear on what you want, set a specific action plan, learn from others who've already achieved what you want, and keep your thoughts focused on the positive action that will propel you forward.

I hope that this content has given you some ideas on how to get back on track to achieving your goals. If so, I'd love to hear from you! Have a wonderful day everyone!